From the day of his Bris, when the Moyel snipped and Daniel sucked on a wine-dipped cotton swab, my little boy was unequivocally Jewish. He had endured the earliest "rite of passage" for Jewish boys, and was awarded a personalized yarmulke as a souvenir of his courage. Tonight, Daniel will wear that very yarmulke for the first time since that fateful day. We are going to a "Tot Shabbat" at KI synagogue, guests of our friends Matt, Rachel, and Harrison Steinberg. We have selected a special event through which we will introduce Daniel to the rituals of the Sabbath. The KI Puppets will make an appearance, and a good time is sure to be had by all. Though I keep imagining the puppets singing "Everyone's a Little Bit Racist" while dressed in rabbinical garb, I imagine this performance will be less "Avenue Q" and more "Fiddler on the Roof."
I wonder what will go through Daniel's mind as he witnesses for the first time the majesty of the ark and the beauty of the Torah. It's usually shiny, so this should capture his attention quite successfully. I think it's important for him to see us there as a family. Judaism to me was always about family and tradition. By bringing Daniel to the synagogue for a family event, I am symbolically passing on this experience to my child. He will take from it what he will (most likely something distinguishing about a particular puppet). Most significantly, however, it will mark the first of many synagogue outings for our family. I can only hope that Daniel will feel the warmth and sense of belonging that I always have.
Friday, October 10, 2008
Thursday, October 9, 2008
My Own Kind of Repentence
In honor of Yom Kippur, I've prepared a list of mommy-related things for which I should atone. Obviously, this is an abridged version of the list -- there are some indiscretions that are just too shameful to share with anyone but my G-d. If my attitude towards these infractions seems at all cavalier, it's solely for the purpose of amusing the reader. I don't mean to make light of anyone's sins, least of all my own. But I digress...
First of all, I'm atoning for missing Yom Kippur services today. When you have a 16-month-old, the last place you can expect him to sit still and be quiet is a synagogue sanctuary on Yom Kippur. We went to music class instead.
I'm atoning for the times I've lost my patience with Daniel, especially in situations that were obviously beyond his control (i.e. pooping for the third time in a row when I'm trying to get us out the door to Gymboree). In those situations that were clearly manipulated by him (spitting out every spoonful of food that goes in his mouth), I probably could have handled my frustration better. Even if, at the time, I wanted to bang my head against a brick wall.
I'm atoning for refusing to play Daniel's music in the car. I love the songs on his Forever Making Music CD's, but there's only so many times you can hear "Hello, I'm Uncle Jerry..." before you seriously lose your cool. In the interest of not driving off the road, I reserve those CD's for bedtime. Daniel recognizes the songs, and they are a great companion to a bottle of warm milk. In my car, my music rules. I think Daniel will grow up knowing more Gwen Stefani and Dave Matthews than Raffi and The Wiggles. And that's the way I like it (but I'll still atone).
I'm atoning for occasionally allowing Daniel to eat crackers, cheese, and baby food for dinner. I try so hard to introduce new, "adult" foods, but some nights it's just too hard to try and force him to eat something he doesn't want. As long as he's happy and satisfied, I can rest easy. I'll continue to push the table foods, so long as I can slip back to my old habits now and again. I promise I'll atone for it next year.
Phew! I don't know about you, but I feel much better. I love my little boy with all my heart and soul. If these mommy sins are the worst of it, then I think I'm doing a pretty darn good job!
First of all, I'm atoning for missing Yom Kippur services today. When you have a 16-month-old, the last place you can expect him to sit still and be quiet is a synagogue sanctuary on Yom Kippur. We went to music class instead.
I'm atoning for the times I've lost my patience with Daniel, especially in situations that were obviously beyond his control (i.e. pooping for the third time in a row when I'm trying to get us out the door to Gymboree). In those situations that were clearly manipulated by him (spitting out every spoonful of food that goes in his mouth), I probably could have handled my frustration better. Even if, at the time, I wanted to bang my head against a brick wall.
I'm atoning for refusing to play Daniel's music in the car. I love the songs on his Forever Making Music CD's, but there's only so many times you can hear "Hello, I'm Uncle Jerry..." before you seriously lose your cool. In the interest of not driving off the road, I reserve those CD's for bedtime. Daniel recognizes the songs, and they are a great companion to a bottle of warm milk. In my car, my music rules. I think Daniel will grow up knowing more Gwen Stefani and Dave Matthews than Raffi and The Wiggles. And that's the way I like it (but I'll still atone).
I'm atoning for occasionally allowing Daniel to eat crackers, cheese, and baby food for dinner. I try so hard to introduce new, "adult" foods, but some nights it's just too hard to try and force him to eat something he doesn't want. As long as he's happy and satisfied, I can rest easy. I'll continue to push the table foods, so long as I can slip back to my old habits now and again. I promise I'll atone for it next year.
Phew! I don't know about you, but I feel much better. I love my little boy with all my heart and soul. If these mommy sins are the worst of it, then I think I'm doing a pretty darn good job!
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
Kids are Wack-o
As a teacher, I've encountered strange children over the years. I had one third-grader who behaved like a dog, even going so far as to have the other students pet him. Another student talked endlessly about "Bionicles," a toy whose characters have names so bizarre that half the time I though he was speaking a different language. The bottom line is, kids are eccentric. The degree of eccentricity varies from child to child, but it always rears its head sooner or later.
Toddlers are among the strangest creatures on the planet. Because they are still trying to make sense of the world around them, they are constantly exploring with their senses (mostly touch and taste!). Objects are fascinating to them, and they develop fixations with certain things. When Peter was a young boy, he was obsessed with vacuum cleaners. He didn't want to clean, he wanted to fly to the moon. Peter would "plug" the vacuum into the sofa cushions and pretend that it was a rocketship. Perhaps this anecdote is a good example of why parents do not rush their toddlers straight to the funny farm. Imagination sparks these strange behaviors. The act of make-believe can make an adult seem "delusional," but it makes a child seem "creative."
For a while, Daniel was obsessed with the Dustbuster. He would push it around the floor and spazz out with excitement when someone turned it on. He was also very fond of measuring spoons at one time. I bought him as many colorful plastic sets as I could find. These days, Daniel is less fixated on objects. He likes to carry out certain actions, some of which could certainly qualify as strange and unusual. One of his favorite activities is to explore inside the refrigerator (not very energy efficient, I know). As soon as he hears the door open, he comes running from any room in the house. He likes to take the condiments off the door shelf and line them up on the kitchen floor. He's particularly drawn to the hot sauce and the jelly. Lately, he's been climbing into the fridge.
He hasn't yet figured out how to get down, so this scenario usually ends in him crying out in fear. Today, he removed a bottle of salad dressing and ran around with it for at least 15 minutes. Then he found my Ugg boots and dropped the bottle into one of them (with the lid on, thank goodness). Crazy, right? Later on, I found him sitting in a drawer of appliance manuals in the kitchen. Sure, it was low to the ground, but what could have possessed him to climb in there? I should probably write down all of the bizarre things Daniel does on a daily basis, because it's difficult to remember so many. For now, I will continue to observe these strange behaviors and laugh to myself about what a "creative" child I have.
Toddlers are among the strangest creatures on the planet. Because they are still trying to make sense of the world around them, they are constantly exploring with their senses (mostly touch and taste!). Objects are fascinating to them, and they develop fixations with certain things. When Peter was a young boy, he was obsessed with vacuum cleaners. He didn't want to clean, he wanted to fly to the moon. Peter would "plug" the vacuum into the sofa cushions and pretend that it was a rocketship. Perhaps this anecdote is a good example of why parents do not rush their toddlers straight to the funny farm. Imagination sparks these strange behaviors. The act of make-believe can make an adult seem "delusional," but it makes a child seem "creative."
For a while, Daniel was obsessed with the Dustbuster. He would push it around the floor and spazz out with excitement when someone turned it on. He was also very fond of measuring spoons at one time. I bought him as many colorful plastic sets as I could find. These days, Daniel is less fixated on objects. He likes to carry out certain actions, some of which could certainly qualify as strange and unusual. One of his favorite activities is to explore inside the refrigerator (not very energy efficient, I know). As soon as he hears the door open, he comes running from any room in the house. He likes to take the condiments off the door shelf and line them up on the kitchen floor. He's particularly drawn to the hot sauce and the jelly. Lately, he's been climbing into the fridge.
He hasn't yet figured out how to get down, so this scenario usually ends in him crying out in fear. Today, he removed a bottle of salad dressing and ran around with it for at least 15 minutes. Then he found my Ugg boots and dropped the bottle into one of them (with the lid on, thank goodness). Crazy, right? Later on, I found him sitting in a drawer of appliance manuals in the kitchen. Sure, it was low to the ground, but what could have possessed him to climb in there? I should probably write down all of the bizarre things Daniel does on a daily basis, because it's difficult to remember so many. For now, I will continue to observe these strange behaviors and laugh to myself about what a "creative" child I have.
Monday, October 6, 2008
Lactose Blues
We all inherit different traits from our families -- physical, behavioral, and medical. Daniel is just a week shy of 16 months, and he seems to be a fascinating combination of me and Peter. Sure, there are things about myself that I hope Daniel does not inherit: poor eyesight, perfectionism, and a tendency towards envy. Peter's personality is much more stable than my own. He is easy to get along with, friendly, and hugely optimistic. But he is not perfect -- the poor thing is lactose intolerant! Imagine having to go through life avoiding cheese and ice cream! Peter's downfall is that he indulges in these foods and ends up sick as a dog. I could basically live on cheese and ice cream for the rest of my life -- that's how much I love these foods. Daniel certainly takes after my love of cheese. He can't seem to get enough. Ice cream hasn't caught on yet. When I see his playgroup pals gobbling it up, though, I know he'll learn to love it in time.
Why all this talk about lactose? Well, I haven't been feeling well recently. I'll spare the reader the details, but my ailments have included nausea, cramps, and massive amounts of gas and bloating. Unsure of the cause, I've hypothesized that it may have something to do with my intake of lactose. Call me crazy, but I fear that I may be allergic to the foods I love most. Just my luck, right? I'm embarking on an experiment this week: NO lactose (or as little as I can control. I'll use soy milk with my cereal, soy cheese on my sandwiches (the stuff is barely palatable), and avoid ice cream and pizza like the plague. Best case scenario, I'll feel much better and maybe even lose some weight! Worse case scenario...well, without cheese and ice cream, I'm pretty much living it.
Only time will tell whether or not lactose is my friend. In the meantime, I will live vicariously through Daniel as he devours cheese like it's going out of style. And I'll keep my fingers crossed for him that he will never see the day when his beloved lactose will be forbidden.
Why all this talk about lactose? Well, I haven't been feeling well recently. I'll spare the reader the details, but my ailments have included nausea, cramps, and massive amounts of gas and bloating. Unsure of the cause, I've hypothesized that it may have something to do with my intake of lactose. Call me crazy, but I fear that I may be allergic to the foods I love most. Just my luck, right? I'm embarking on an experiment this week: NO lactose (or as little as I can control. I'll use soy milk with my cereal, soy cheese on my sandwiches (the stuff is barely palatable), and avoid ice cream and pizza like the plague. Best case scenario, I'll feel much better and maybe even lose some weight! Worse case scenario...well, without cheese and ice cream, I'm pretty much living it.
Only time will tell whether or not lactose is my friend. In the meantime, I will live vicariously through Daniel as he devours cheese like it's going out of style. And I'll keep my fingers crossed for him that he will never see the day when his beloved lactose will be forbidden.
Sunday, October 5, 2008
A Day of Exploration
Today we set off on an adventure -- we took Daniel to the Garden State Discovery Museum. It's not possible to find this place by accident. Located in Cherry Hill, the museum occupies the former Courier Post building in the middle of a nondescript industrial park. My friend Rachel told us about it and encouraged us to check it out. It was the perfect place for Daniel to explore on his own. The museum was small, not at all crowded (certainly in comparison to the Camden Aquarium, which was our second choice destination), and very accessible to a newly-walking 15-month-old. The exhibits were laid out in open spaces, where everything could be touched, manipulated, or climbed upon. Perfect for Daniel! He was in awe of the car exhibit pretty much right away. Typical boy!
Daniel sat in the driver's seat, put his hands on the steering wheel, and let his imagination run wild! Another favorite was the animal habitat -- a hollow tree with multiple levels through which the kids could climb. Peter accompanied him inside, while I tried to predict which hole he'd emerge from.
I got to live out a fantasy of my own in the news studio. Peter manned the camera while Daniel and I did our best Jim Gardner/Lisa Thomas-Laury impressions. Actually, we were more like Anchorman Ron Burgundy and Veronica Morningstar! Watch your back, Cecily Tynan!
Perhaps the museum's highlight for adults was a large pseudo-Lite Brite wall with plastic pegs. Daniel got a kick out of moving the pegs from hole to hole, but Peter and I enjoyed the sheer nostalgia of the exhibit. I tried not to think about how many sticky little hands had touched the pegs before us.
Other exhibits included a veteranarian's office, a construction site, a malt shop, and a fairy tale castle. Daniel was definitely too young for some of the interactive aspects of the museum, but he still enjoyed roaming around and exploring with his hands and feet. I'm sure we will return in the not-too-distant future to continue the adventure!
Daniel sat in the driver's seat, put his hands on the steering wheel, and let his imagination run wild! Another favorite was the animal habitat -- a hollow tree with multiple levels through which the kids could climb. Peter accompanied him inside, while I tried to predict which hole he'd emerge from.
I got to live out a fantasy of my own in the news studio. Peter manned the camera while Daniel and I did our best Jim Gardner/Lisa Thomas-Laury impressions. Actually, we were more like Anchorman Ron Burgundy and Veronica Morningstar! Watch your back, Cecily Tynan!
Perhaps the museum's highlight for adults was a large pseudo-Lite Brite wall with plastic pegs. Daniel got a kick out of moving the pegs from hole to hole, but Peter and I enjoyed the sheer nostalgia of the exhibit. I tried not to think about how many sticky little hands had touched the pegs before us.
Other exhibits included a veteranarian's office, a construction site, a malt shop, and a fairy tale castle. Daniel was definitely too young for some of the interactive aspects of the museum, but he still enjoyed roaming around and exploring with his hands and feet. I'm sure we will return in the not-too-distant future to continue the adventure!
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Stefanie v2.0
It's hard not to live in the moment when you have a toddler at home. Thoughts of your younger, less responsible self are almost always overshadowed by the snot on your cashmere sweater or the poop under your fingernail (yes, I washed my hands immediately afterwards!). College seems like a distant lifetime ago, and the single city girl you once were has been replaced by impossibly younger versions (seriously, why does everyone at the bar look like 14-year-old jailbait?). As I get older and continue to reinvent myself, it becomes increasingly more difficult to look back and truly remember what it felt like to be 24 and single, when my biggest concern was what to order for lunch from the Penn "ski lodge." Now that I'm a wife and a mother, I find it nearly impossible to sympathize with my younger self. Worrying whether or not HE would call? Give me a break. The insignificance of that compared with Daniel's health and well-being is ridiculous. I don't mean to come off as elitist or condescending. It's just that I've always been someone to carry the weight of the world on my shoulders for everyone to see. Pain and suffering? I can compete with the likes of DeNiro. That hasn't changed. But there's so much more at stake now than when I was a single city girl. My happiness is bound to Peter's and, most significantly, to Daniel's. While the responsibility to my husband and son can sometimes be scary and overwhelming, I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Expanding Food Horizons
Daniel has always been a good eater. From breast to bottle and beyond, he consumed plenty -- so much so that my sub-6 pound preemie blossomed into a sturdy, 22-pound one year old! While his tastes and preferences have shifted, his ability to put away a considerable amount of food in one sitting has remained consistent. Now that he is approaching 16 months old and is moving around like the Energizer Bunny on speed, I can't help but wonder if he requires even more nourishment than he currently gets.
I'm beginning to make some changes in Daniel's food repertoire. The last bottle of formula is dwindling, soon to be replaced by organic whole milk. The canister of baby oatmeal will soon be empty, and I hope to convince Daniel that eggs are not as awful-tasting as he currently believes. I'm doing a better job of not stocking up on copious amounts of pureed baby food, but rather taking the time to prepare a variety of "adult" foods for him to try. We've added veggie burgers, cream cheese and jelly on whole wheat, Pirates Booty, waffles, and pizza crust to the rotation. Part of me is excited for the shift; my little boy is growing up! But the feeling is definitely bittersweet. Baby food was easy -- portable and cheap! I always knew how much he was getting. Now I'm faced with that scary uncertainty. Did he eat enough? Did he get something from each of the food groups? Can a toddler overdose on cheese?
Today I made Daniel Ellio's pizza for lunch, and he ate about a dozen pieces. He seemed to really enjoy it (what's not to enjoy?) and the chewing wasn't even too much of a problem. I was proud of him, and of myself for venturing into unfamiliar food territory. I did spoon-feed him baby applesauce in between bites of pizza, but no one's perfect! Baby steps, as they say...
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